Amber is "Ate" ( Tagalog word for older sister) and Ina is "Ading" (Ilocano term for younger sibling). Amber only started to realize that she doesn't have all our attention anymore when Ina started walking, she started to realize that everything must always be equally divided into two and that she must give way to her sister because she is younger. This for me is not an easy phase because they are still kids and even if you explain it to them a thousand times it will still take time and a lot of patience.
This young, they are showing signs of their personalities. Amber is your typical eldest child. She is showing signs of being domineering. Ina, on the other hand, is showing her sweetness with a brat-like attitude. Both are constantly fighting over my full attention, my "lay-lay" (lullaby dance), my piggy-back, my horsey-horsey, etc. When they don't fight, which happens twice or thrice out of the ten times that they play together, their sweetness usually lasts in like a minute or two then they are back to their not-so-cute selves. Nowadays, there are more shouting, pushing, hair-pulling, scratching and all those "little" dirty tricks. As a fulltime mom, I get to see most of these tricks with a worried, questioning and wondering look. Worried because I am thinking if I taught them wrongly that they resort to "violence" in expressing their feelings; questioning because I wanna know fast how to best deal with fighting toddlers, the toddler way; and wondering if my sister and I used to fight this way when we were toddlers. But of course, our mother cannot answer me because she has always been a working mom and she didn't have the "luxury" of always watching us go through all those childish acts/antics. I, on the other hand, can still remind my girls that hurting each other is not nice and that they should treat each other "lovingly,"...... if only these words don't go into deaf ears. But, when they do "volt in," I become the odd girl out. Ina is becoming an avid fan of her Ate that she imitates, follows and can even be pacified by her Ate with just a hug. For now, I just have to keep on reminding them that they should always look after each other. I may sometimes get frustated when I always have to remind them of this but they are still kids afterall.
I have 3 siblings. I can't say we're really close but I have to believe that they look up at me being the eldest and more "sane" among us. My brothers until now I still don't get. My sister is another story. Liezl and I were not that close when we were younger maybe because of the age gap or just maybe because we have different personalities. For so long, I thought my sister was different from me. In a way, I still think she is. But motherhood must have made her mellow down from her usual defiant self or, was it me that motherhood had tamed? I don't actually remember us literally hurting each other when we were little but I also don't exactly remember us being openly close to each other. She was your typical outgoing, outspoken, party-like girl while I was your typical "Manang" who'd rather stay at home and watch tv. We just don't like the same things, well, almost. But, now that we're both married, with kids and more matured (I believe), we appreciate each other more. Having gone through the same situation of having babies away from our Mama and all the other convenience and comfort of Home, we somehow understand each other more now. We can cry, laugh and talk about anything now thru chatting or thru the phone. I love my sister, more than she knows. I love all my siblings, more than they know. I might be harsh sometimes or just too frank but beneath all those scoldings and do-not-care attitude, I really do care and worry about them. Having a sister is something special because there will always be a special connection.
My girls now are like us, Liezl and I. Despite the bickering, shouting, crying, "violence" and differences, we still find something that binds us. Something that friends cannot give or even our husbands cannot understand. Ates take care of their Adings and Adings will always, always look up at their Ates. We are girls, we are mothers, we will always be Sisters..... forever.F
This young, they are showing signs of their personalities. Amber is your typical eldest child. She is showing signs of being domineering. Ina, on the other hand, is showing her sweetness with a brat-like attitude. Both are constantly fighting over my full attention, my "lay-lay" (lullaby dance), my piggy-back, my horsey-horsey, etc. When they don't fight, which happens twice or thrice out of the ten times that they play together, their sweetness usually lasts in like a minute or two then they are back to their not-so-cute selves. Nowadays, there are more shouting, pushing, hair-pulling, scratching and all those "little" dirty tricks. As a fulltime mom, I get to see most of these tricks with a worried, questioning and wondering look. Worried because I am thinking if I taught them wrongly that they resort to "violence" in expressing their feelings; questioning because I wanna know fast how to best deal with fighting toddlers, the toddler way; and wondering if my sister and I used to fight this way when we were toddlers. But of course, our mother cannot answer me because she has always been a working mom and she didn't have the "luxury" of always watching us go through all those childish acts/antics. I, on the other hand, can still remind my girls that hurting each other is not nice and that they should treat each other "lovingly,"...... if only these words don't go into deaf ears. But, when they do "volt in," I become the odd girl out. Ina is becoming an avid fan of her Ate that she imitates, follows and can even be pacified by her Ate with just a hug. For now, I just have to keep on reminding them that they should always look after each other. I may sometimes get frustated when I always have to remind them of this but they are still kids afterall.
I have 3 siblings. I can't say we're really close but I have to believe that they look up at me being the eldest and more "sane" among us. My brothers until now I still don't get. My sister is another story. Liezl and I were not that close when we were younger maybe because of the age gap or just maybe because we have different personalities. For so long, I thought my sister was different from me. In a way, I still think she is. But motherhood must have made her mellow down from her usual defiant self or, was it me that motherhood had tamed? I don't actually remember us literally hurting each other when we were little but I also don't exactly remember us being openly close to each other. She was your typical outgoing, outspoken, party-like girl while I was your typical "Manang" who'd rather stay at home and watch tv. We just don't like the same things, well, almost. But, now that we're both married, with kids and more matured (I believe), we appreciate each other more. Having gone through the same situation of having babies away from our Mama and all the other convenience and comfort of Home, we somehow understand each other more now. We can cry, laugh and talk about anything now thru chatting or thru the phone. I love my sister, more than she knows. I love all my siblings, more than they know. I might be harsh sometimes or just too frank but beneath all those scoldings and do-not-care attitude, I really do care and worry about them. Having a sister is something special because there will always be a special connection.
My girls now are like us, Liezl and I. Despite the bickering, shouting, crying, "violence" and differences, we still find something that binds us. Something that friends cannot give or even our husbands cannot understand. Ates take care of their Adings and Adings will always, always look up at their Ates. We are girls, we are mothers, we will always be Sisters..... forever.F
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